Behind the wall.

9 03 2013

It was hopefully the final night of being in hospital, it was hot in there and between the temperature of the room, the sickness and the runs, there was little room for sleep.

Laying next to me was a patient whose wife had seen him admitted, but had to go back to the country to keep everything running, neither he nor I had seen a family member or friend for days, and we were both slipping into a kind of madness.

Nothing works unless you ask for it days in advance, there’s no TV and there’s no Phone, if you bring in a Radio it might work.

This Man wanted to phone his wife and tried to ring her, only to discover it wouldn’t let him, so he beat the crap out of it with the handset. Now I’m not one for vandalism, but I understand why he did it.

Behind the wall, someone who worked at the hospital was reciting a story they’d written, and now and then they would ask one of the nurses to play one of the characters, none of them were actors, that was plain, they all sounded like they were reading words from a page.

But the strangest thing about it was the story was about Wolfie the Werewolf.

I remember hearing bits and pieces of the story, and the accompanying score, for there was music to go with it, in between random hospital noises.

I would have got out of bed and tapped him on the shoulder, and shown him my t-shirt with my avatar on it, if I wasn’t so sick.

There he was, telling the tale aloud, while the real Wolfie was having a hard night, only meters away.

Wolfie!

PS – His Wolfie died, I lived and went home to Katie.





AIR FM – Transcript. Melbourne, Australia

12 02 2013

Werewolves of Melbourne – Lesley Jones
Broadcast: Monday 11 February 1986.

Werewolves have been a part of human folklore for centuries, and later
took the starring role in many of our books and films, filling us with
fear late at night, and giving us blood curdling nightmares… If we could
sleep at all.

Many of us thought that the Werewolf would remain a fictional character
forever, until Australian born rock singer Wolfie Rankin “came out” during
the “Aurora” concert in 1983.

Has it changed our perceptions about who and what the Werewolf really is.

Wolfie Rankin, Thankyou for coming into the studio tonight.

It’s a Pleasure, Thankyou.

I began by mentioning horror movies, and wonder if you think that there’s still a tendency for people, your fans included, to think about the werewolf as a blood thirsty creature of the night? and does it bother you?

No, not really, I mean it has been discussed among some of the other werewolves but we’re not generally worried about it, many of us grew up watching those movies, I certainly did…

You didn’t know you were a Werewolf until you were fifteen, right?

That’s right.

When you first transformed, what was that like? Was there any warning?

Well I remember having the odd twinge in my body and not worrying about it all that much, it wasn’t until after the fact that I looked back with Twenty-Twenty vision and went, Oh, So that’s what that was.

On the day that it happened, I remember being very stiff and sore and my fillings fell out.

It happened during the day?

Yep, Two PM on a Saturday afternoon, so pop goes that cliche. *laughs*

Would you mind taking us through what it was like?

Happy to, I know there are others out there who haven’t changed yet, and while I took it fairly well, others have a really hard time with it.

I’d been out walking Laddie, our Dog, with Dad after lunch and my body began to ache, it wasn’t too bad, but I remember sort of limping around and once I was home, I told Mum who was fairly concerned, especially after me going “Oh look, another filling popped out”.

She straightened my bed and made me lay down, and filled the hot water bottles up for me.

Good old Mum.

Yes exactly, Dad was worried too, I remember hearing him in the kitchen asking Mum if She wanted him to drive me to the hospital, Mum didn’t know what to do, but I’m glad they didn’t do that or it would have made things so much worse.

Anyway, once it happened, there was no pain, it was almost like my body let out this big sigh and all the tension left, and then it was like I had an erection over my entire body, and all the fur sprouted.

It felt lovely, really… but I also felt strangely drunk.

Then I noticed my arms, and my hands and just thought “Oh that’s nice”, and
about five minutes later it started to occur to me that I’m going to have to tell someone.

I thought of Teen Wolf…

So the movies got some things right then?

Oh, It’s generally accepted that if any movie got things right, that Teen Wolf came the closest. *Laughs*

My whole life is basically a better version of Teen Wolf, except the costume is better and I have a Guitar rather than a basketball.  *Laughs*

So what happened then?

Well I wanted to panic a bit, but I couldn’t get up, and Mum came back and
that was that.

How did She take it?

It was difficult, She wasn’t sure what I was, or maybe even who I was, I think she had thought a few things which she still hasn’t told me… but there I was, all seven feet of me, with my legs sticking out at the end of the bed.

She wasn’t prepared for it, how could she be?

I’m grateful that she didn’t watch horror films, I think that would have made things worse, she had none of that imagery in her head so, perhaps, it was easier for her.

Dad was a different kettle of fish, I remember him coming in and looking at me, and his mouth dropped open, and then he said “You alright Son?” and  I said “Yeah, I think so”… although my mouth wouldn’t work properly so I sort of mumbled it. and he nodded and that was that. It’s funny how some people react.

He wasn’t fussed?

Not at all, There’s a part of Dad which never grew up, which I think we all have, but I could just see that sparkle in his eyes that said “Cool!”.

I’m glad because I think it made everything easier for Mum.

Dad helped me get out of bed, and was somewhat surprised when he saw how big I was,

I wrapped my arm around him for support because I was still wobbly on my feet, My Dad is this big truckie and I think he was straining under the weight, so he’s trying to hold me up without falling over and I’m trying not to knock him over or run into anything, it was a mess. *laughs*

My whole body had changed into something new and I had to re-learn how to do everything.

I was getting around the house awkwardly, trying to walk without falling over and I was saying “Look at me, look at me” and then at some point I remember thinking “Oh crap, I’m naked”, so I went to the bathroom and put a towel around myself, and that’s all I could wear for a few days.

You didn’t change back?

No, I was like that for a solid month or more, so I was confined to the house. and you know, I’m generally an inside person, but not going out wore thin, I snuck out a few times, late at night to walk the dog with Dad.

I had no idea if I would revert to my old body or not, and I was worried that it might hurt if I did, or something would go wrong, if I’d die.

What kind of difficulties did you face over that month.

You begin to realise how much of this world is made for “normal people”, You don’t really get it until your body changes in such a drastic way and things which were easy to use can suddenly be difficult.

The first night I changed, I couldn’t use a knife or fork, so Mum cut things up and fed me as though I was a baby, I think she quite enjoyed doing that even though she was also still really worried about me.

It was difficult to use a toilet, I had to really think about that one but
eventually everything worked out well.

What about playing the guitar.

If anything, that seemed easier, for which I was grateful. Having claws at
the ends of my fingers was a real asset there.

Except I couldn’t sing, It took me a good few months to understand how my voice worked.

I remember reading an article earlier on where someone suggested you weren’t really a werewolf, and that it was all some sort of publicity stunt.

Oh yes, I’ve read a few of those too. *laughs*

They cited your ability to form words with a “dog shaped mouth” as impossible.

Well there you go, that proves it then *laughs* Fake as…
I do understand though, there’s a lot of things which shouldn’t be possible and people think well, logically, that can’t be right.

When you went on The Don Lane Show shortly after coming out on stage, didn’t that help?

Not really, I think a lot of people still think the whole thing’s as fake as the moon landing, I’m not fussed about it really, But the Doctors and Vets who examined me that night, were convinced that I wasn’t fake. but then they had difficulties with their workmates and patients so in retrospect although I wasn’t just trying to clarify my position, it wasn’t good for them and it came across as a bit of a stunt.

I know you’ve spoken about it many times before, but what was it like to come out on stage like that?

Difficult, I was more worried about the other Weres than myself, I’ve done well for myself over the years and have a nice big home with security, but not everyone else does.

Although we’ve never been all that secret, people just saw us but would keep it to themselves, people aren’t worried about Werewolves at all which sort of flies in the face of everything… it’s like “Oh, You’re a Werewolf? <pause> cool” and it’s a kind of a let down really *laughs*.

Certain People in Melbourne, the vagrants, the ladies of the night, the cops, always knew we were there..

So when….

But you know the band had no idea, and I just told them I’d make this big announcement and not to worry too much, just keep playing. it was ok, but it got a bit complicated later when we had to have a long talk about it, but after a month or so, we were just us again.

You mentioned the other Werewolves, are there many of you and where do you
gather?

There’s perhaps around thirty of us at the moment, others always show up. We have a place which has been converted into a sort of pub, we hang out there and then go for a walk if we feel the need for a lung full of smog… But I’m not going to say where it is.

mind if we dispel a few myths?

Not at all.

Full Moons?

It’s bollocks, although I find I can’t sleep very well when there’s a full moon. I can change at any time, and so can all the others.

What about Silver?

Well I’ve been to a few lovely evenings where silver cutlery was involved, nothing happened. I can’t say anything about silver bullets as I haven’t been shot at and neither have any of my friends, I hope that remains the status quo.

Is it a curse?

*laughs* Definitely not, it’s incredible, I love it.

Next Album?

We’re still working on it, but it’s getting close to being finished, We’re hoping for a release date of around May or June and another concert in June or July we think.

AHA! A Scoop!

Yes indeed!

Wolfie, Thanks for coming in, and good luck with the next album and tour.

Thankyou for having me and for your wishes.

I’ve just been chatting to Wolfie Rankin and as he says a new album around
May or June, Sounds good to me.

It’s five o’clock here at Air FM.

Archival:

Copyright Air FM 1986

Air Digital, Melbourne Australia.





Football

29 09 2012

Today I walked into Bakers Delight while shopping.

The lovely Woman behind the counter, who’s always cheerful, asked me if I would be watching the game.

I questioned her,  “The game?”

“The AFL” She said, and then it clicked, I was completely oblivious to it, Football means nothing to me at all.

As with most people, I began to find out about sport, when I was just a kid, and it seemed to me that everyone barracked for a team.

The question was always “Which team do you barrack for” not “Do you like football?”

I never had a team, I could have made one up, (some did, it made conversation easier) but I tended to be the honest sort.

My parents weren’t into footy, so I wasn’t brainwashed into it like so many other kids, I was allowed to think for myself, and after consideration, taking into my brain that playing footy would give me the opportunity to chase a ball, while wearing hardly anything, in freezing weather, being pushed into mud, having bits of my anatomy broken, and potential coma and/or death,  I decided it wasn’t for me, it must’ve taken me ten seconds to work it out.

But I’m not even interested in watching it, I just don’t see anything in it.

So word began to spread that I didn’t like football, and it seemed that I wasn’t into any other sport either.

And people talked, you know, because I was “weird”.

I think conversation went along these lines “He doesn’t like sport… must be a poofta”.

So here was I at the age of ten, being called a poof, and I had no idea what it meant.

So thankyou football for giving me a reputation, I did try to live up to it in later years.

I was born and raised in Melbourne, in case you’re wondering, and I was ten in 1975.

Attitudes have certainly changed, I don’t think there’s nearly as much homophobia around today, and there are many people around, who, like me, simply couldn’t give a toss.

Perhaps I’m a trend setter?

Wolfie!





One day in Geelong.

30 08 2012

In the 70’s, Mum and Dad owned a holiday house, at 40 Harvey Road, St Leonards.

St. Leonards is a small town not far from Melbourne, and it sits close to the ocean, in fact all we needed to do to get to the beach, was simply walk to the end of the street.

Though we rarely ever went there, because it was generally too cold.
So we’d be inside reading or playing records, or watching television.

“Holiday House” wasn’t really the proper name for it as something always had to be done.

Dad always seemed to be mowing the lawn, or fencing or painting, or digging a big hole for some reason, while Mum did exactly the same sort of things she did at home.

We had a problem too, whenever we had a few days down there, I’d get sick, and nobody knew why until the day Dad was doing something under the house, and discovered a huge lake of water, directly under my bedroom, so he drained it. The water ran out from under our place…but collected under, and around the house next door, the neighbour was not pleased.

It was towards the end of one of these bouts of ill health that Mum and Dad made a fairly poor decision to go to Geelong for the day.

The day was lovely and sunny as far as I can recall, and We stopped in front of Coles Cafeteria, I think we all loved those, but they’re not around anymore, sadly enough.

We went inside and up the stairs, to where all the food was.

The idea was to take a tray and slide it along the counter, taking whatever food you fancied, and paying at the end of the line.

Mum hoped I’d find something I’d actually eat, since I had not eaten much in several days.

And then I saw it, it was some kind of a milk drink, in a very fancy glass, and had a straw poking out at the side… and it was a lurid green, so of course I wanted it.

Now if you’re hoping Mum told me “NO” and made me get something else, I’m sorry… because
She allowed it, Much to her eternal regret.

So we returned to our table and hopped into our goodies, and I drank that lurid green concoction, whatever it was, I’m not sure if I had anything else, not that it matters.

And then I said those words that nobody wanted to hear.

“Mum, I’m going to be sick”

Mum and Dad leapt to attention, as the first eruptions began to rumble, and grabbed my hand and ran down those steps, towards the glass doors as quickly as they could.

I don’t know how Mum did it, She was so “un-co” that she could trip over a pin, but she bolted down those stairs with the finesse of an athlete.

And just as those glass doors were pushed open, lurid green spew went everywhere, which left a massive green splodge over the footpath as though the Ghost busters had run over Slimer with a Steam Roller.

Mum frantically apologised and was completely red faced, But I think she was relieved that we had at least made it outside the building.

I don’t remember much after that, except that versions of this tale had been told by Mum over the years to practically any sympathetic Mum who’d listen.

Oh, and we never went there again.

Wolfie!





Atheistcon Melbourne

15 04 2012

A small group of Islamic fundamentalist turned up to #atheistcon. A gay couple Gregory Storer & Michael Barnett kissed.

Image

 

Aussies sing Monty Pythons “Always look on the bright side of life” in front of Islamic Fundamentalists at Melbournes Atheistcon.

Image





Rally 4 Dec, Melbourne. – Inquiry into Catholic Church, Sexual Assault and Suicide Prevention.

24 11 2011

Hi one and all!

You should be receiving either 2 attachments or 2 flyers in the body of this email. If not, please let me know. (Not included with G+/Facebook post)

I am organising a rally on the steps of Parliament on Sunday 4 December, 12 noon for about an hour.

The reasons are to:

1. Continue the push to have the details of the people who suicided in the years following clergy sexual assault to be handed over to the coroner for re-investigation. Things are at a standstill.

2. For the State Government to hold an urgent independent Inquiry into Catholic clergy sexual assault. Other than waiting for the outcomes of the Cummins Inquiry (which may address three issues – mandatory reporting; Working with Children Act 2005 requirements; reporting of child abuse to secular authorities) there is no word from the Attorney-General about an independent Inquiry.

3. The other essential reforms are listed on the second flyer.

The state government’s decision a few weeks to put on hold a public inquiry into sexual abuse in the Catholic Church is unconscionable and carries a serious risk of further suicides by victims of clergy sexual assault.

After publicity a few months ago about 26 suicides in Ballarat and Box Hill of young men in the years following catholic clergy sexual assaults, family members of more victims came forward about a loved one committing suicide after being abused by clergy. This brings the above number to 35. But clergy abuse-related suicides have not necessarily ended. Many impact statements from other victims of convicted paedophile Robert Best recently revealed ongoing suicidal thoughts and tendencies. And the above number refers to victims of just two clergy.

The church continues to sit on its hands and the state government, which has full knowledge of these facts, is employing delaying tactics. The Attorney-General, it seems, is not taking these issues very seriously at all.

Thanks a lot and look forward to seeing you there.

Any problems with attachments, please let me know.

The best.

Judy

JUDY COURTIN
0418 329 049





Bread

4 10 2011

I have a problem with Baker’s Delight bread, Not that there’s anything wrong with it, I find it perfectly tasty and buy it every week.

No, My problem, is with, or rather “begins” with, That freebie card that they stamp when I buy things.

And the fault is entirely mine.

This is what happened today.

I asked for two High GI Loaves, and had them sliced.

Then I noticed that I had a free bread on my card, and showed the girl, but she said that I had to spend at least another $1.60 to get the free loaf.

This was fine because as some of you know, I just bought one of those sandwich makers, and if you own one, you’ll know that you can go through bread at an amazing rate.

So I asked for a half-sized, plain white loaf with poppy seeds, which was enough to allow me to have my free loaf.

I also noticed that there were two danishes there, so I got those too.

I took my stuff outside where Katie (My Malamute) was waiting patiently, tied up safely to the hydrant, minding my stuff which I’d just bought from Coles.

I packed everything up and went home.

When I unpacked, I realised that the small loaf was not there.

And that’s it, right there.

Whenever I get a free loaf, something happens to it… I usually leave it on the counter, if not at Baker’s Delight, then the counter at Antipasto… a cafe and deli, just a few doors down.

If I don’t lose the bread, then it gets squashed or some other weird thing will occur.

Today was unusual in that I’d lost an item I had payed for.

I could’ve thrown a tanty when I realised what had happened, but no, it’s normal… I just shrugged and got on with life.

Despite the fact that this happens almost every-time, It’s just typical of me,
and I suppose I just have to laugh.

Perhaps I should give up using those stamp card things?

Wolfie!