No Mum, I’m not going to Church.

28 03 2013

Mum, You make me go to School and despite the bullies who threaten me daily, I go, because legally I have to, and because you make me.

So I suffer through it from Monday to Friday

But the weekend is mine, Mother.

If you want to me to go somewhere to learn to be a Naturalist, an Astronomer or to learn to play an instrument, that might be ok.

But you are not wasting my Sundays, by sending me off somewhere to learn bullshit, because that’s all it is, Mother… Bullshit.

And if that offends you so much that you’re going to threaten me with that old chestnut “I’ll pack your bags and throw you out” line, then come on Mother, I’ll help you pack those bags right now.



I’m sure people will read this and think My Mum was one of those horrible religious types, she really wasn’t, but she did have a religious upbringing (she was brain washed). My older Sister went to Sunday school, and I think Mum just wanted to keep up tradition somehow.

She had no gripes with anything David Attenborough said about evolution and had given it a little thought.

When she was mad at me she would sometimes let fly with “You’re a heathen like your bloody father” Poor Dad, he really did have more sense in this regard, but again, Mum had her doubts.

She would sometimes threaten to pack my bags and send me away, but she wouldn’t have.

I once lost my train ticket in the city and the phones had been vandalised at the station, I had to walk all the way back to school before I could even phone her… this was the 80’s. I found her in tears, thinking something had happened to me.

So where did this come from?

It’s fictional, I was letting off some steam in the kitchen just before, thinking about what I should have said back then, only I couldn’t have… I wasn’t as articulate as I am now, and I generally felt powerless.

If I could have faced her with this, she would have backed down, and we probably would have used those spare days to go to the country, or to have lunch in the hills, or to visit relatives.

Much more productive really, than going to church, Heck, staying at home watching cartoons on tv is more productive than going to church, you can learn valuable stuff, like Never buy Acme products and The spooky swamp creature is probably some twit wearing a mask.

No, Mum wasn’t the baddie, but I wish we’d had this conversation back then.


Political enigma

21 09 2012

There are two groups of people who I don’t understand, Women and Gays who vote Republican, and I think this equally applies to the Australian LNP.

I find the treatment of Women by both parties utterly appalling, as no government anywhere should have any power to tell a Woman what she should do with her own body, That is something which should remain completely up to her.

And Gay people, especially those who might want to marry at some stage. Denied all rights from the conservatives, who most likely hope they’ll go to church more often and “Pray away the Gay” rather than stand up for their own personal feelings, which are not doing any harm to anyone.

When I see either of these groups voting Republican, it’s rather like coming across someone banging their heads against a brick wall and complaining that it hurts.

Stop doing it?



7 08 2012

Consider this,

Science has the capability to do many wonderful things, and if left to it’s own devices, it would bring us closer to cures for parkinsons disease, cancer, diabetes, deafness and blindness.

But then some idiot pops up and yells “Gods rules” and the whole thing is held back 50-100 years or more while friends and family watch loved ones suffer

The scientists then spend years battling with these arseholes, for that’s what they are, to try to get them to listen to actual facts, rather than three thousand year old fables, written by mad hermits in caves.

And because YOU sit there and think religion should be tolerated, because it’s “harmless” YOU allow these fuckwits to brainwash more and more children into believing bullshit.

Do we want people who can think for themselves, or do we want mindless twats who can only repeat what some kidfucker said in church?

This is the dark ages folks, to future generations who escaped the nonsense of religion, this will be considered the dark ages.

Stop saying that religion is not hurting anyone.
Today was the day we saw Curiosity land on Mars, via a performance which would have stunned any athlete, If we had listened to all the Priests, Bishops, and Popes… all the professional liars, we’d still be in basic homes with dirt floors, no electricity, no computers or phones.
Thanks to Religion, We could be 500 years behind where we ought to be.

Thought about Science and Religion.

23 05 2012

I have been wondering what makes a person religious, and push science away, when they could be a perfectly rational person.

And yes, there are various emotional reasons, but…

This occurred to me while I was cooking this evening.

If I want to be religious, and feel included with others (feeling included is a big thing with people) then all I really have to do is walk down the street and walk into a church… it’s not going to cost anything, or much, usually. and it’s fairly hands-on, fairly quickly.

Whereas, I’m not sure where I’d start If I had no internet access… The Library? A Museum? That’d be OK, but how do I become “enabled” within the science community, Meaning meeting people, doing stuff, I don’t really know.

I’d like to see a Church of Science started, where people could just get up one morning and walk down the street and mix with real scientists, ask and discuss the big questions… one on one… much like you’d do with a Priest.

And be given guidance, so that a person could be shown the way, so they could find answers to questions, or even more questions.

Maybe we’ve locked science up too much? could that be it?



14 05 2012
We are living in 2012, and who is holding us back from the future?
Right wing religious buffoons.
We can’t have freedom to love who we want,
We can’t have stem cells which may fix a plethora of disease
Scientists are apparently stupid
and Climate Change isn’t happening
I had cancer in 2005, and I know very well where I’d be if I’d had a horde of priests and nuns praying that I’d get better, instead of the medical science and skill which did in fact make me better.
I refuse to give the religious one moment of my time, I have put a sign on my letterbox which reads “No Religious Propaganda” did they ignore it? Of course! Because I’m so in need of the word of God or something.
I tear it up and put it straight in the bin.
I have fought and argued with you dinosaurs over and over, and all you do is quote passages from your pathetic book.
Well no more, 

You’re a Christian?

Fuck off.

My Short Fuse

12 02 2011

The PE teacher at high-school, who I almost bit on the ankle once, said that if we should ever feel angry, we should beat up our pillows… I was against that, for one thing, I’m a passive sort of fellow who rarely go angry… I think it’s because I’m large. You never see Clydesdale horses who are pissed off, they’re calm and together, while Shetlands bite. It’s the same with Dogs… Nine times out of ten it’s the little dog who’s full of agro, while your larger dog couldn’t care less.

And I am passive… oh you noticed that bit about taking a chunk out of the PE teachers ankle, eh? well yes, there was that, In the 80s Physical Education was a bit like boot camp, do this, do that, twenty pushups from you for doing the wrong thing… it was supposed to cultivate respect, or something… But I just thought he was a prick.

One day I was made to do these pushups for some crap I had apparently done, and he was standing, right there, within easy reach, and I was tempted, oh so sorely tempted to sink my teeth into his ankle, seriously too, drawing blood and all.

I was mostly angry with him, I hated sports and PE, and I hated wasting my time with it when I could’ve been laying around in the library, absorbing a book on inventions.

I stopped bringing my uniform, and kept saying “I forgot it, sir” which really meant “I didn’t bring it, you skinny cunt, I don’t want to join in”.

Once he bought me a huge pair of shorts, which would have fitted Dumbo, and asked me to put them on… I was torn between wearing them and having the balls to say that I wouldn’t… but years later realised what I shoud’ve done was streak naked through the high-school, who’s main building seperated each classroom with massive sheets of glass, making sure that everyone would’ve got a good view… and I would’ve been expelled, a good job too, I hated the place something fierce.

Sometimes I think that I am an angry person, that deep inside something is bubbling away like a sleeping volcano that may erupt.

I have no tolerance for religion anymore, it’s something that got in my way, stunted my views, tripped me up, blocked my path and basically made life difficult.

When I aired my views to my dear but brainwashed Mum, She yelled out “You’re a Heathen, Just like your Father”, What could a kid do? Although there were times that Mum raised her own doubts.

Dad used to say that he thought the Bible was “A big fish story”.

I highly suspect the reason I was packed off to Sunday School when I could have spent the day resting, was Mum was having problems with my emerging sexuality, and wanted to put the fear of God into me… not that the sunday school people were like that, they were pretty nice people, Not the fire and brimstone type.

Or it was to do with My Cousin who was going through relationship problems, so they’d send all the kids to sunday school to give them a free hours woman to woman chat.

There was a touch of tradition there too, Mum and my Sister had attended, and Mum had a family background with the Salvos and their band.

The first time I saw cancer, it was with Laddie, my very special collie x shepherd, who was my right arm, rather like Katie is today, it was always Laddie and I who did things together.

Laddie taught me responsibility.

Then the cancer came along, and he literally mented like an ice-cream in the sun, I prayed and prayed for him, but nothing could be done, and in the end he died at the vets surgery, just an hour before he got the needle.

I saw a tumour grow in Timothy, a lovely cat, this ball grew inside him at frightening speed, and there was nothing I could do about it, He was put down too.

The next was Dad, who writhed in pain in bed, he had tubes hanging out of him, and there was this smell, it’s always the same smell, like rotting wood, I know what cancer smells like now, I’m too familiar with it, it lingers in the room.

Dad would rush to the toilet and cry out in pain as he tried to move his bowels, there was a mess on his hands, on the walls, a pervasive odour of urine in stained Pyjamas. Dad was a giant, full of brawn and it whittled him down to this, there were prayers again, not that any of them did any good.

Benny, My lovely Malamute, which Dad gave to me after Laddie passed on, was out gentle giant, a loving being who adored everyone, including cats, especially cats, but never other dogs, even females. He taught me how to be open, and be myself, and not worry what others thought, Benny was the escense of Wolfie, had it not been for him, I would never have come this far. He could really let rip with his deep howls, which were useful as Mum lost most of her hearing in the weaving mills years before, She couldn’t always hear the phone ring, but Benny could, and it would get him howling… “What did the phone say?” We’d ask him, and he’d howl in reply… Visitors loved the show, and Benny was always very keen to show off to people.

Benny got cancer, and I prayed, I prayed a lot, but he withered away until eventually his back legs couldn’t hold him, he cried as the vet examined him in our Bathroom, He couldn’t move. His cries sounded like “Oh No!, Oh No!, Oh No!” It was like someone was mourning a child who had just been run over by a train, the sound stabbed me like a knife.

He was given the “green needle” and off he went, we carried him off in a bag.

There was myself, who I’ve written about before, so we’ll skip this.

Then I smelt that smell in Mums Room, That same musty odour, and I told her it was there, I knew that one of us had it, or the carpet was damp, I hoped for the latter, but it wasn’t long before Mum passed on.

Then the phone went one night and it was my Sister, She had Ovarian Cancer… She fought it for over a year, and I really thought she was gaining th upper hand, but she didn’t. Three lots of chemo I think she had, three lots?
I could barely handly one lot… I didn’t think She was as strong as that, and was amazed with her fight, but it was a fight that she lost, and she was cremated last September.

So don’t talk to me about how great your God is, how merciful, and how wonderful he is, there was no help from above. If God was so great, then why did we get cancer in the first place? why were we all forced to suffer? why was I allowed to remain alive even though all my family are dead?

Religion is my trigger now, it sets me off quicker than anything.

I despise it.

God botherers on twitter get a mouthful of abuse if they try to suggest that as an athiest, I’m wrong, I’m not wrong, I know from painful experience that I’m not wrong.

I hate being angry, I really do… there was a time that I was more tolerant, but I can’t be now.

In my opinion, religion has held back science to such a degree that had it been allowed, then perhaps medicine may have been decades ahead of itself, and perhaps there would have already been a cure, perhaps… my family would have still been alive.

I seethe with rage everytime some nut says that “Evolution is just a theory”.

Personally I think Science ought to be using a new word, call it a “fact” instead, get rid of that stupid word, why is science so precious about it anyway, If the whole of Australia suddenly feels that what we used to call biscuits are actually Cookies (Because as you know, The Americans are ALWAYS right, and as a second class country, we’re just not as good as them, they just know better) Then “Theory” can be changed to “FACT.

Science can do this, because unlike some people, we have that flexibility.

So I fight religion now, each and everytime I come up against it, I blog on athiesm, I retweet stories about how catholic priests rape kids and treat Homosexuals poorly, claiming they spread AIDS while simultaniously banning condoms, I post scientific literature on Facebook and discuss it in science forums, I add my voice to the many who are waking up from history and seeing the logical truth which we can clearly see in our age.

Religion is dying, allow it to die, it’s a sad relic of our tribal history.

So please forgive my little explosions on twitter and other places, I really hate being angry, but these days I am just a little more bitter than I’ve been before.


Losing my Religion

4 07 2010

Earlier today I came across a youtube video about brainwashing kids to believe evolution is wrong, dinosaurs didn’t exist and an idiot who thought that teaching her kids religious nonsense was “simply a lot easier and made more sense”.

Mum battled with getting me to believe, Mum grew up among family members who were in the Salvos, in fact a few of our family were in the local Salvo band.

Though she was an interesting case, although she believed in God, she never went to church, at least in my memory, and I’m not sure why.

Mum had been a churchgoer earlier on, and was even a Sunday School teacher for a while, My sister also attended sunday school.

About as much as I can recall of religion when I was growing up, were those awful US evangelists on television on a sunday. In the 70s, it was law for Aussie TV to have several hours of religious content… but this was thankfully dropped in later decades.

Mum was strange though in that whenever a nature program came on, which spoke of evolution, she never criticised it. Though she’d point her finger at me at times and yell “You’re a bloody heathen, just like your bloody Father”. Whenever I was “bad” I was always my Fathers Son or just like the other side of the Family.

We had religious instruction at primary school in the 70’s, but suddenly for whatever reason it was not required anymore, whether this was a change of government or school views, I’m not sure.

I remember some kid dobbing me into the pastor (or whatever he was) telling him that I didn’t believe in God, the fellow had a word with me but I don’t remember anything he said and it didn’t matter anyway, the words ran off me like rain from a ducks back.

The class was strange, My feelings now was that it was a bit like being taught facts and figures and then having a class dedicated to elves and fairies (which may have been more fun).

I always found religion sombre and dreary, it may have been different if I’d been bought up in the US with one of those soulful black choirs, whose music I could feel on the inside… maybe I would have gone on to enjoy music more for the experience, but the religion would have gone just the same.

During the 80s, Mum pushed me into Sunday School, so I had to stand there and sing like a goose and read parts of the bible and pray, She’d glare at me and growl “It won’t hurt you to go” when I’d protest, so instead of laying in bed like a teenage boy with a hardon and a dirty mind should, I was forced to get up an have Jesus forced down my throat, sometimes I wondered if Mum had noticed a few of my urges and was hoping she could squash them back down before I became a total animal with a few threatening words about the man upstairs.

Sometimes I though Mum was in it for the freebies, this church was extremely generous at picnics and I do admit the food was good, and oddly they weren’t too pushy with the whole God thing.

But I think it gave me a whole pile of guilt about my feelings and who I was which ontop of what I already carried around, was something I simply didn’t need.

I briefly toyed with religion myself during the 90’s when I became interested in Chinese Medicine, Shiatsu massage, Natural medicine, Native American beliefs and Reiki (which I was told was the same sort of healing power that Jesus used). I was great at reiki and shiatsu, people loved receiving a massage from me, and it was the sort of quiet hobby I needed at the time.

I became quite a spiritual person, around that time. it was my hippy phase, but without the drugs, booze and the free love.

But I got over it and moved on, and became a volunteer at Melbourne Zoo just shortly before a lot of bad stuff began to happen in my life, including the death of my Father, My wonderful Dog and the discovery of why I had been sick for so long.

Mum came to see me in hospital shortly after the removal of my rectal cancer, which was a six-hour operation. She inspected my wrist band with my name, number, home address and religion on it, and saw that it read “No religion”.

She questioned me on that, and told me that I’m Protestant, I looked at her and said “No I’m not, I don’t even know what that means”, I think she was a little surprised that I’d say… all my life I had not been religious, sometimes I said I believed merely to keep my peace with her, but I never was and this was my moment.. She wasn’t upset with me, she was just grateful that I was still alive.

Mum would sing while she was in the kitchen, she often only knew a few phrases of songs, but it was enough for her. sometimes it was a tune from the 40s, something from theatre or the pictures, sometimes a song that came out during the war… sometimes it was a Hymn.

She loved to watch “Songs of praise” but would get quite upset and angry when an old tune that she loved was “all hepped up”, sometimes she’d fight it by trying to sing louder than the television, in the old style… if looks could kill.

But a few weeks short of her passing, it was odd to hear her singing REMs “Losing my religion”. to me, that seemed to indicate that her God had left her and she didn’t care anymore, perhaps she had accepted that I was right after all.


The video which was mentioned in the story.