You get what you pay for

When I want to buy an appliance, I will be considering a few features I want, and probably need, plus the reputation of the company and the price.

I will then go to a shop, have a really good look at what I may be buying, and if it shapes up to my expectations, I will pay for it.

That’s how I’m sizing up the Government.

But this is how I see most Australians.

Bloke reckons he wants a TV, goes to The Good Guys, Says “I’ll have that one because Tony, reckons it’s Ace” Pays his money.

Finds out the TV is too large for where he wanted it, Lacks most of the features he wanted, and despite everyone telling him beforehand, discovers for himself how unreliable the company which made it, really is.

Bandwidth explained

I sometimes write for people who may be raw beginners on the internet, and this will be one of those posts.

There’s a word going around at the moment which you may have heard, especially in discussions about the NBN here in Australia.

It’s Bandwidth.

I’m going to explain to you exactly what bandwidth is.

Imagine that data, is water, and your computer is an empty bath.

Now, imagine there are three sets of taps over your bath.

One tap is really small, it’s only about as wide as a drinking straw.

The second tap is the normal sort of tap that anyone would have over their bath.

The third is huge, it looks more like a fire hydrant than a tap.

Now out of those three, which do you suppose would fill your bath the fastest?

The big tap!

And yes, there would probably be some splashing involved if it was turned on full.

Because the big tap is really big, a lot of water can go through it all at once.

That’s really all it is.

The tiny tap represents Dial up internet, Very slow, It will take hours to fill your bath.

The normal sized tap represents Broadband over copper wires, Fast-ish, but nothing amazing.

While The Big Tap represents Broadband over optical fiber, BIG SPASH, All Done!

Easy?

Sorry Day

Going Backwards

Australia may soon have a new right wing government, and I personally find that a very scary thought.

Strangely enough, We call them The Liberal Government, their name indicates a left wing government, but yes, they are right wing, because of this, I prefer to call them the LNP or Coalition.

While we vote for a party in Australia, most of us have a leader in mind when we vote, so in reality I think we do vote for a leader, even though they may not be on our ballot papers, when we think of the Labor Government, We think of Julia Gillard, and equally we think of Tony Abbott in opposition.

Tony has been, as is often the case with right wing governments, a bit cosy with New Limited, and it’s leader Rupert Murdoch. (as is the case with Fox News in the US which is owned by Rupert Murdoch).

Why is this a bad thing?

Imagine you own all the newspapers, some radio stations and some TV stations, and you have a lot of people reading your work, or watching it on television once they’re home, that gives you a lot of power.

For instance, if you had a friend who built houses, and you decided to tell everyone, via your media company, that your friend builds the best houses, and another bloke built poor houses, then without checking the facts a lot of your readers and viewers would believe you and go off and pay for your friend to build them a house.

Your friend would get really rich and maybe the other builder who may have even built better houses, could go broke.

And that’s the trouble with people, people believe stuff… it’s easier to believe stuff, rather than checking to see if it’s right, a lot of people say they have no time to check the facts, and often they don’t know how to.

This is why people buy particular smart phones, or vote for people, or go to church.

Belief is a fence, a handy device to keep the sheep all together in one paddock. when people believe in things, they’re far easier to control.

While it may be harder to spend time sorting out the facts, perhaps simply by reading, you could end up with a better product in the end.

A lot of people right now are being told, by News Limited, that everything Julia Gillard does is wrong, but Tony Abbott is Mr Perfect, which is a bit like saying Bohemian Rhapsody was never as good as Achy Breaky Heart.

And they’re quite happy to accept it as the truth.

But in a few months we may have a leader who doesn’t believe (so he says) in Climate Change, Thinks that we should keep mining Gas and Oil rather than look at alternatives like wind and solar, Thinks wireless internet will work just as well as fiber optic cable (as a techie I can tell you it won’t, nothing is faster than light), doesn’t seem to like migrants much, doesn’t like gays and lesbians.

If we are so easily conned, then the future will not be pretty.

What Australia will miss without an NBN

The NBN confuses a lot of people, but it’s not that hard to understand.

It’s all about light, light is the fastest thing we know and it’s light which gives the NBN all that amazing speed.

OK, but surely the cheaper version the LNP are suggesting will be cheaper and better?

Not really, the new internet the LNP are suggesting will let us down in a few areas, for instance.

Very soon a new kind of TV format will be launched, called Ultra High Definition, The clarity of these sets is going to be amazing, and should make current HD TVs look like a portable colour TV from the 70s.

But there’s a problem, the only way stations can transmit the UHD TV signal, is over fiber. The signal cannot be sent through the air like standard free to air television which we’ve all been used to.

If Australia does not have the NBN in place, there will never be UHD TV in Australia, it’s that simple.

And that’s just one of the big ticket things we will miss out on, if we don’t have an NBN.

Wikipedia article on Ultra High Definition TV

Five reasons why Australias NBN is better than Google Fiber

Wolfie!

The Irrits

The other day Carol Duncan played a song which I had never heard before, It was “State of the art” by Gotye”.

And the song is about one of those Hammond organs which they tended to flog a lot on television in the 70s and 80s.

The video, on the other hand, is a weird sci-fi cartoon where this computerised instrument takes over the family and turns them into robots.

Ever since I heard the song, it has become an earworm which won’t go away, I think because it touched a nerve.

You see, in the 70s and 80s, I knew this family, I’ll call them the Irrits, because that’s what they gave me, sorry, but I couldn’t stand them, and because one of them may Google themselves one day I’ll change their first names too.

And this is why, firstly I had nothing in common with them, The Irrits had four kids who I mostly found annoying.

I liked my own company, but suddenly, and often over Christmas holidays in the Aussie Summer, they would arrive at our holiday house and park their caravan down the back, I’m not really sure how a family of five fitted into a caravan, but they managed it.

They had all the luxuries at home though, they had a great car, and a house, which only got larger as they moved onwards and upwards, with a pool and a spa… and the six car garage… but then they did run a taxi service, so that’s fair.

They had the biggest black and white TV that anyone could afford, and a superb quadraphonic Hi-Fi system.

The lead Woman of this Family, Let’s call her Shazza, liked to boast that when she bought the Hi-Fi, that the Man in the shop said “You must really love your music” to which she replied “Oh yes, We love Country and Western” and the poor Man was nearly sick, “You mean you’re going to play Country and Western… on THIS!?”

Are you beginning to see some faults? bare with me.

Oh, there was that organ too, the amazing organ which could make all these incredible sounds, but of course the lead Man, let’s call him Bazza, Couldn’t play a thing.

The house, as fancy as it was, was crammed with the worst kitch at the time, a clock which looks like a cat whose eyeballs and tail would move, little animal figurines, string pictures on the walls, paintings of sunsets.

My Dad couldn’t see the forest for the trees, Dad loved Bazza, thought he was the dogs bollocks, But Mum saw right through the lot, and so did I.

You know how they got all that money?

They barely ate, that’s right, the three teenage boys were thin as a rake, and when they visited us, Mum would put on a banquet, food was loaded onto the table and it would all be sucked up as if by a hoover minutes later.

I remember once when I was a little kid, they looked through every drawer in my bedroom to find money, I was naive then, I thought they were looking for toys or something to play with, but I don’t blame them, I suppose if I was that hungry, I may have taken a risk myself.

We visited them once, and I was offered a drink of cordial, Shazza had diluted it so much that it may as well have been tap water, in fact I said it out loud “This cordial takes like water” well did I get scolded for that, By Mum… it was something she raised a lot when she was angry with me over the years… but eventually I said “Mum, it was the truth wasn’t it?” and she never picked at me over it again.

Once when They visited us, Their daughter, the youngest, really needed a drink, Shazza told me that if I give her a drink of cordial, not to make it too strong, did I listen? pigs to that, it was probably the best drink of cordial the poor girl had ever had.

Another time when we were sitting in their kitchen, their daughter very gingerly asked Her Mum if she could have some BBQ Shapes, a snack biscuit which is popular here in Australia, and often a kid would just take the whole box and eat them all in front of the TV, I know I did.

Shazza took a babies plastic bowl, opened the box, took THREE out and put them in the bowl, and sent the poor kid away with that. My jaw almost hit the floor.

Their clothes were all moth eaten, their shoes were from the local tip or the op shop.

Mum witnessed Shazza washing the dishes once, barely a dribble of Embassy detergent in luke warm water.

When we went on holidays to Queensland (From Melbourne) Mum would pack a hamper full of sandwiches and there’d be a thermos of hot water for tea, coffee or cup-a-soup, there was always an assortment of cool drinks and chips and lollies. we would stop around six in the evening at a reasonably priced motel, to bed down.

When they went, they took no food, despite having five people in the car, they would exist on a few cans of coke and I remember Shazza saying that they pulled over to where a bloke was selling fruit, they bought an entire box of passionfruit  and ate those, nothing else for the whole journey… and they never stopped, a full 24hr drive, non-stop.

I don’t know how they existed like that, I know we didn’t have that much, although we had the extra house… We ate well and our clothing was always good… though I use that word lightly after a review of some of the photos from back then.

How do you step from the front door of a huge home wearing the thinnest, oldest and cheapest clothing?

I’m pleased to say that the rest of my family were lovely and I often enjoyed being with them, but the best thing about the Irrits was when they went home.

Wolfie!

AIR FM – Transcript. Melbourne, Australia

Werewolves of Melbourne – Lesley Jones
Broadcast: Monday 11 February 1986.

Werewolves have been a part of human folklore for centuries, and later
took the starring role in many of our books and films, filling us with
fear late at night, and giving us blood curdling nightmares… If we could
sleep at all.

Many of us thought that the Werewolf would remain a fictional character
forever, until Australian born rock singer Wolfie Rankin “came out” during
the “Aurora” concert in 1983.

Has it changed our perceptions about who and what the Werewolf really is.

Wolfie Rankin, Thankyou for coming into the studio tonight.

It’s a Pleasure, Thankyou.

I began by mentioning horror movies, and wonder if you think that there’s still a tendency for people, your fans included, to think about the werewolf as a blood thirsty creature of the night? and does it bother you?

No, not really, I mean it has been discussed among some of the other werewolves but we’re not generally worried about it, many of us grew up watching those movies, I certainly did…

You didn’t know you were a Werewolf until you were fifteen, right?

That’s right.

When you first transformed, what was that like? Was there any warning?

Well I remember having the odd twinge in my body and not worrying about it all that much, it wasn’t until after the fact that I looked back with Twenty-Twenty vision and went, Oh, So that’s what that was.

On the day that it happened, I remember being very stiff and sore and my fillings fell out.

It happened during the day?

Yep, Two PM on a Saturday afternoon, so pop goes that cliche. *laughs*

Would you mind taking us through what it was like?

Happy to, I know there are others out there who haven’t changed yet, and while I took it fairly well, others have a really hard time with it.

I’d been out walking Laddie, our Dog, with Dad after lunch and my body began to ache, it wasn’t too bad, but I remember sort of limping around and once I was home, I told Mum who was fairly concerned, especially after me going “Oh look, another filling popped out”.

She straightened my bed and made me lay down, and filled the hot water bottles up for me.

Good old Mum.

Yes exactly, Dad was worried too, I remember hearing him in the kitchen asking Mum if She wanted him to drive me to the hospital, Mum didn’t know what to do, but I’m glad they didn’t do that or it would have made things so much worse.

Anyway, once it happened, there was no pain, it was almost like my body let out this big sigh and all the tension left, and then it was like I had an erection over my entire body, and all the fur sprouted.

It felt lovely, really… but I also felt strangely drunk.

Then I noticed my arms, and my hands and just thought “Oh that’s nice”, and
about five minutes later it started to occur to me that I’m going to have to tell someone.

I thought of Teen Wolf…

So the movies got some things right then?

Oh, It’s generally accepted that if any movie got things right, that Teen Wolf came the closest. *Laughs*

My whole life is basically a better version of Teen Wolf, except the costume is better and I have a Guitar rather than a basketball.  *Laughs*

So what happened then?

Well I wanted to panic a bit, but I couldn’t get up, and Mum came back and
that was that.

How did She take it?

It was difficult, She wasn’t sure what I was, or maybe even who I was, I think she had thought a few things which she still hasn’t told me… but there I was, all seven feet of me, with my legs sticking out at the end of the bed.

She wasn’t prepared for it, how could she be?

I’m grateful that she didn’t watch horror films, I think that would have made things worse, she had none of that imagery in her head so, perhaps, it was easier for her.

Dad was a different kettle of fish, I remember him coming in and looking at me, and his mouth dropped open, and then he said “You alright Son?” and  I said “Yeah, I think so”… although my mouth wouldn’t work properly so I sort of mumbled it. and he nodded and that was that. It’s funny how some people react.

He wasn’t fussed?

Not at all, There’s a part of Dad which never grew up, which I think we all have, but I could just see that sparkle in his eyes that said “Cool!”.

I’m glad because I think it made everything easier for Mum.

Dad helped me get out of bed, and was somewhat surprised when he saw how big I was,

I wrapped my arm around him for support because I was still wobbly on my feet, My Dad is this big truckie and I think he was straining under the weight, so he’s trying to hold me up without falling over and I’m trying not to knock him over or run into anything, it was a mess. *laughs*

My whole body had changed into something new and I had to re-learn how to do everything.

I was getting around the house awkwardly, trying to walk without falling over and I was saying “Look at me, look at me” and then at some point I remember thinking “Oh crap, I’m naked”, so I went to the bathroom and put a towel around myself, and that’s all I could wear for a few days.

You didn’t change back?

No, I was like that for a solid month or more, so I was confined to the house. and you know, I’m generally an inside person, but not going out wore thin, I snuck out a few times, late at night to walk the dog with Dad.

I had no idea if I would revert to my old body or not, and I was worried that it might hurt if I did, or something would go wrong, if I’d die.

What kind of difficulties did you face over that month.

You begin to realise how much of this world is made for “normal people”, You don’t really get it until your body changes in such a drastic way and things which were easy to use can suddenly be difficult.

The first night I changed, I couldn’t use a knife or fork, so Mum cut things up and fed me as though I was a baby, I think she quite enjoyed doing that even though she was also still really worried about me.

It was difficult to use a toilet, I had to really think about that one but
eventually everything worked out well.

What about playing the guitar.

If anything, that seemed easier, for which I was grateful. Having claws at
the ends of my fingers was a real asset there.

Except I couldn’t sing, It took me a good few months to understand how my voice worked.

I remember reading an article earlier on where someone suggested you weren’t really a werewolf, and that it was all some sort of publicity stunt.

Oh yes, I’ve read a few of those too. *laughs*

They cited your ability to form words with a “dog shaped mouth” as impossible.

Well there you go, that proves it then *laughs* Fake as…
I do understand though, there’s a lot of things which shouldn’t be possible and people think well, logically, that can’t be right.

When you went on The Don Lane Show shortly after coming out on stage, didn’t that help?

Not really, I think a lot of people still think the whole thing’s as fake as the moon landing, I’m not fussed about it really, But the Doctors and Vets who examined me that night, were convinced that I wasn’t fake. but then they had difficulties with their workmates and patients so in retrospect although I wasn’t just trying to clarify my position, it wasn’t good for them and it came across as a bit of a stunt.

I know you’ve spoken about it many times before, but what was it like to come out on stage like that?

Difficult, I was more worried about the other Weres than myself, I’ve done well for myself over the years and have a nice big home with security, but not everyone else does.

Although we’ve never been all that secret, people just saw us but would keep it to themselves, people aren’t worried about Werewolves at all which sort of flies in the face of everything… it’s like “Oh, You’re a Werewolf? <pause> cool” and it’s a kind of a let down really *laughs*.

Certain People in Melbourne, the vagrants, the ladies of the night, the cops, always knew we were there..

So when….

But you know the band had no idea, and I just told them I’d make this big announcement and not to worry too much, just keep playing. it was ok, but it got a bit complicated later when we had to have a long talk about it, but after a month or so, we were just us again.

You mentioned the other Werewolves, are there many of you and where do you
gather?

There’s perhaps around thirty of us at the moment, others always show up. We have a place which has been converted into a sort of pub, we hang out there and then go for a walk if we feel the need for a lung full of smog… But I’m not going to say where it is.

mind if we dispel a few myths?

Not at all.

Full Moons?

It’s bollocks, although I find I can’t sleep very well when there’s a full moon. I can change at any time, and so can all the others.

What about Silver?

Well I’ve been to a few lovely evenings where silver cutlery was involved, nothing happened. I can’t say anything about silver bullets as I haven’t been shot at and neither have any of my friends, I hope that remains the status quo.

Is it a curse?

*laughs* Definitely not, it’s incredible, I love it.

Next Album?

We’re still working on it, but it’s getting close to being finished, We’re hoping for a release date of around May or June and another concert in June or July we think.

AHA! A Scoop!

Yes indeed!

Wolfie, Thanks for coming in, and good luck with the next album and tour.

Thankyou for having me and for your wishes.

I’ve just been chatting to Wolfie Rankin and as he says a new album around
May or June, Sounds good to me.

It’s five o’clock here at Air FM.

Archival:

Copyright Air FM 1986

Air Digital, Melbourne Australia.

The Patriot

It’s Australia Day soon, and I don’t really care for it.

I’m not Patriotic, I’m not one of those people who wrap themselves in a flag and somehow think they’re superior to everyone else.

When I was a kid, Mum was aware of certain Mothers who would be asked to come to the office to discuss a problem child.

“Oh No, Not MY little boy, You see He’s a perfect little angel, He’d never do anything like that, It must’ve been the child sitting next to him” they’d say.

Patriotism is just that, an imagined perfection in our own culture, it blinds people to ones own problems, which is a shame, because we know that if someone can admit they have a problem, then they can do something about improving themselves.

Oh look, I do love the country, I especially love the natural aspects of it, I’m just not, and never will be, a patriot.

The Rise of Australia as a Superpower?

Wouldn’t it be strange if during the next election Romney wins, and the US slowly recedes back into a less scientific country.

Where there’s less research, less education, more bible study in schools, no understanding of climate change, no acceptance of gays, more oil and gas mining, being more suspicious of the internet and it’s users.

And people who based their livelihoods on science and progress, moved to Australia, where there are more initiatives to power our country with renewables, for which we need smart people to drive those ideas.

Could it be possible that in time, we become a technological superpower, while the US sinks back into God, Oil, A Womans place is in the home, putting Gays in jail, something akin to the 1950s?

I’ve been wondering about this for some time.

Wolfie!

Feminism 2012

When stories about Julia Gillard giving Tony Abbott a good telling off, hit the local news, they were all negative.

Well of course, most of the media is owned by right wing organisations, it was expected.

But what the local media wasn’t prepared for, was that the story would go global, and when the news overseas got hold of the story, they wrote it as they saw it, without the right-wing spin.

Julia was just a mad woman on a crusade against “a good man” as our papers made out.

That wasn’t how most of us saw it.

I typed “Gillard” into the search box in Tweetdeck, a desktop app for Twitter, and what I saw were thousands of people, thousands, congratulating Julia for standing up for herself, and women in general.

And I get the feeling that the local media is beginning to back down, as I’m starting to see stories suggesting that maybe, Julia was right, as she was!

I think feminism has been re-started this October, in Australia.

And it’s been given a make-over.

Feminism, had a poor image, Dowdy Women in overalls who hate men is the image which comes to my mind.

Women don’t want to hate Men, they want equality.

And that’s what they ought to have.

I want to see it happen, I want Women to have equal pay, and to be treated with respect.

I’m sure you know from what I’ve written earlier that I’m a great fan of equality, I am a white Aussie bloke, who wants to see more fairness on this planet, for everyone.

It’s 2012, Racism, Sexism, Homophobia and all that nonsense, simply shouldn’t be happening anymore.

Wolfie!

Read Mike Carltons’ excellent story, which is similar to mine, but a much better read.